The following letter was written by a Crossroads for Women client who participated in our Residential Rehabilitation program and is now in our Outpatient Program. She shares this letter, written to herself, to inspire others out there who are in recovery, or who are searching to find recovery, from drug or alcohol addiction.
It makes me sad and a little angry to have to write to myself under these circumstances. I am not angry at me. I just never really thought I would have to have “the drug talk” with myself. I will keep this simple and straight to the point. Drugs will destroy me, just look at what they have done to my life. I will spend the rest of my life fighting a disease for which there is no known cure. I can only send it into remission with support meetings and hard work. Following is what I believe t be an easy way to explain drug addiction.
Recipe for Disaster
1 curious teenager
1 – 2 friends already using
1 money hungry drug dealer
1 6 pack of beer (or any alcoholic beverage available)
1 upper of some kind
1 small bag of crack
1 line of heroin
Combine curious teenager, using friends and drug dealer. Gently fold in any combination of the optional ingredients. Let sit for a few months. Then, take the mixture and put it in a blender on “high” for 1 – 20 years. Blending time may vary, depending on how much you are using and the optional ingredients you chose. Stop the blender and take the cover off. It looks like a mess and guess what…
It’s my life.
I now have to figure out what I will do with this mess I’ve created. I can pour it down the sink. Remember: “This is my life,” and start the recipe over. I can go to the hospital where they will tell me that they cannot separate the ingredients for me, so I will give up. Or, I can go to rehab, where they will help me learn to sift through the mixture and extract the ingredient of the curious teenager and find a healthy adult. The rest of the ingredients will be taken away and properly disposed of.
I must always remember that there are optional ingredients all around me, and I must learn a new recipe for healthy living.
Recipe for Life
1 healthy adult
1 Higher Power
1 – 1 million support meetings
1 drug- or alcohol-free day at a time
1 summer day at the beach
1 family who loves and supports me
1 long-term job
1 wallet with money in it
the list goes on and on
Combine the healthy adult with the Higher Power and a bunch of support meetings. Gently fold in as many of the endless optional ingredients you want. Let sit for the rest of my life and enjoy.